Blessing and her husband Allen like any young couple were excited not only by the fact that they were newly married but also about the prospects of growing their own family soon. However, as they battled infertility and won, they remind us that God works miracles, dangerous and almost impossible to believe but very true. Read their remarkable story here.
I am Blessing Allen-Adebayo and I work in an NGO that addresses poverty and conflict in the Niger Delta. I spend a lot of time travelling, and meeting people. I enjoy reading and solving problems.
The Journey Begins
I got married in December 2014. Before I got married. I was diagnosed of Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) but my husband and I knew we were going to have children irrespective of the doctors report. Coincidentally, everyone I knew who had PCOS had children, so I didn’t think it was going to be an issue, despite the doctor’s report. Unfortunately, it seemed like the condition worsened, at some point they recommended the removal of my ovaries (they were severely enlarged and the pain was unbearable). My Pastor prayed with me and the pain and swelling disappeared. It is a long story, let me just get to the conception of my twins.
He settles the childless woman in her home as a happy mother of children. Praise the LORD. (Psalm 113.9)
In 2017, God gave my husband and I a word in Isaiah 49:17 and we were saying it on replay, so we knew it was time. At this time, I had stopped going to the hospital or taking any medication. In September 2017, my husband and I went to the hospital and the ultrasound scan showed no symptom of PCOS anymore. There was an ongoing IVF promo so it seemed like a good time to do it. I made enquiries and was supposed to come for hormonal assay on the 3rd day of my next period.
(Just want to mention here that every time I prayed about the IVF, I always felt what I can only describe as a feeling of ‘being alone and abandoned’, I spoke to my husband about it and he reassured me that we were together and he was going to be with me every step of the way, and I had a host of people praying for me, but that feeling was just there and I couldn’t shake it off)
The next month, my period I was 10 days late ( It had been regular for the last 2 years-one year with metformin, the other year without). On the 11th day, it came, I didn’t use more than 1 change of pad, and by the next morning, it was gone. I wasn’t sure what to make of it, I decided to wait for the next month.
When my period didn’t come the next month, I went to the hospital (I hated home test strips, I couldn’t stand to see that single line again, someone else should look at it and tell me) to do a pregnancy test and it was negative.
Later that month, I attended a prayer retreat and while I was praying God started talking to me about infertility and delays in child bearing, and how it was never his purpose and how the primary target was marriages. And He said to me, the devil knows that you will have children eventually, but before it happens, he wants to destroy the marriages. And I asked him, when are you going to give me children? He said to me, ‘see you are pregnant’ and I believed him. (This was January 5th, 2018).
After God told me I was pregnant, I began to feel nausea headaches, cramps (by this time there was still no period. I would get some spotting every other month up till April). At the hospital, the tests showed malaria and a negative pregnancy test. I didn’t take the malaria drugs. (I already had two miscarriages from pregnancies that were not detected until it was too late so I had zero confidence in any medical report)
One day in February, one doctor had convinced me that I was not pregnant. I was at a friend’s wedding, enjoying the moment, all of a sudden, I felt something move in my stomach.. it left like ‘a fish wave its tail in water’, and a ‘knowing’ registered in my spirit …’ that’s your baby’.
The impression was so strong, I looked at the front of my dress and I was soaking wet with tears I didn’t know I was shedding.
Then my stomach started growing, I began to feel kicks, I bought a digital doppler and found the baby’s heart beat.
Navigating Through Doubts
Truthfully, it was a long ride and I had many days of doubts. All the doubts were in the realms of my thoughts and intellect. My spirit was solid on God’s word
Because I’m a believer, whether I doubt or not. There were things I would do constantly.
Every day I read 6 bible stories: of Sarah, of Rebekah, of Hannah, of Elizabeth, of Mary, of Manoah’s wife*
We would speak God’s word only.
We would break bread (communion) daily, sometimes several times a day.
One day, when I felt like I couldn’t continue, I began to pray, pouring my heart to God and showing him my weaknesses, and He said to me, ever so lovingly, ‘ My strength is made perfect in your weakness’.
I had the right kind of people around me. God had surrounded me with people of faith.
I had crazy intimate friends who would call me regularly and we’d have ‘screaming sessions’ rehearsing the testimony of the miracle. (Crazy women of faith, like 6 of them)
I had one person in my life who was constantly praying with me and sharing testimonies of miraculous (physically impossible) conception and birth. Not a coincidence, this person also has twin girls.
My Advice to my Sisters Waiting and What I Did in My Waiting Season.
Make a list of all the people you know who are also trusting God for children and pray for them every day. For every time you pray about your situation, pray twice as much for others and rejoice when God answers your prayers for others.
If your words and prayers for others can come to pass. Your words for yourself will come to pass. This is the principle you cannot practice with yourself because your emotions are involved, so practice getting answered prayers by praying for others. Then it will happen for you.
I started Joyful Mother’s Network in 2017, right in the heart of my waiting season to encourage mothers to rejoice over their children yet unborn
The Miracle is still unfolding
My pregnancy was never confirmed medically. Negative pregnancy test, negative ultrasound scan, negative trans-vaginal ultrasound. It’s ‘fat’ they said, ‘loose weight’ they said. The dark line across my navel grew darker as my tummy grew but they said perhaps I was born with it. I felt kicks and was recommended psychiatric evaluation, it was ‘ all in my mind’ they said. From May/June everyone could see a bump.
I learned that my strength will fail me but God’s strength is made perfect in my weakness
And I learnt that God’s word is the ultimate truth, and I can follow him with my eyes closed because what I see is not real, what He says is the reality.
Pictures via The Allen-Adebayo family archives shot by : @faith_anny
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